The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet.
As a moviegoer, I'm always annoyed when a big joke is ruined in the trailer, but generally, it actually makes it play better.
I cannot tell a joke. But I can do a situation, that it becomes a joke.
Now, everybody, I suppose, is aware that in recent years the silly business of divination by dreams has ceased to be a joke and has become a very serious science.
For the amount of talent I had - and I couldn't dance, act, or tell a joke - I enjoyed a tremendous career.
There's always been a quiet conversation and joke that if you're not hard, if you're not from impoverished neighborhoods, if you're not certain constructs of a black stereotype, then you not black.
The joke newspaper, it says Canada abandons the monarchy.
I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me.
You know how hard it's been to write material? Because to do stand-up comedy, it takes time for the material to develop. So you'll come up with a joke, you'll tweak it, you'll work it for six months, you really fine tune it, and now you've got a good bit. Well, with Trump, every day there's something new coming out.
There's a joke that, if you can ride through Texas with somebody, which is 700 miles of just straight, flat freeway riding, then you can be friends with them forever.
Like all women, I've had a pretty awful time in many ways, but it's always possible to either make a joke or find someone else.
I am so pathetic with machines in real life, it's not a joke. I'd rather walk, or even run, than take the car out myself. I like to be driven around. Yes, I like fancy cars, and fancy bikes, too. It's my dream to learn how to ride one myself, but for now, I am content being driven around.
I was desperate for new material, so anything I can write a joke about that works is in the act. No matter who it offends, or who it bothers - doesn't matter if its something my wife hates.
See, justice is a joke in this country, and it stinks of its hypocricy.
I will do almost anything for the sake of a joke or for the sake of someone's real belief in something to help tell a story. I will not do something shocking for the sake of being nasty. If it's not hurting anyone's feelings, I'm in on the joke.
Years ago I was a runway model, and I used to get laughs. I thought it was a joke anyway.
We joke about it in the entertainment industry: Every actor wants to be a musician, and every musician wants to be an actor.
Dick Martin, if you put a gun to his forehead, he couldn't tell you a joke.
I never smile when I have a bat in my hands. That's when you've got to be serious. When I get out on the field, nothing's a joke to me. I don't feel like I should walk around with a smile on my face.
I never knew what basketball was. I started playing on the playground. People used to laugh at me and joke at me because I was so tall and I didn't know the game and couldn't play it.
A lot of times in movies, especially in sequels, the characters become caricatures and just sort of improv machines and joke machines, rather than people you can actually connect to.
U.S. soldiers, with whom I now have more than a passing acquaintance, joke that they track my movements in order to know where they will be deployed next.
To convince another part of the world that Bollywood is not just jokers who break into song and dance was very difficult. I'm literally ploughing the ground and making people understand that Indian actors are not a joke.
I'll say things that are serious and put them in a joke form so people can enjoy them. We laugh to keep from crying.
Any woman who chooses to behave like a full human being should be warned that the armies of the status quo will treat her as something of a dirty joke. That's their natural and first weapon. She will need her sisterhood.
If something stinks, I say it stinks. But I try to massage it a little and not be as cutting, come behind it with a joke: Hey, I cut you deep, but now let me put a couple of stitches in you.
The simile has to match the tone of its surroundings and has to be like a little joke. Writing a simile that isn't funny on some level is quite hard.
Laughter is binary: It either happens or it doesn't. As each joke arrives in the course of a film, the cavernous space of the theater is either filled with joy and laughter or with the quiet of cringing embarrassment. Every time you step to the plate to make a joke, you're going to experience one or the other.
As a kid, I drew comics. I had curly hair. I liked to joke, but I was kind of nervous about it at first until it was coaxed out of me.
I've been burn when it comes to my hair that it ain't no joke.
I have a new joke today. Martha Stewart's on suicide watch. They had to unplug all of her ovens.
Running for me is a sport. It's not a joke. It's serious.
Be not affronted at a joke. If one throw salt at thee, thou wilt receive no harm, unless thou art raw.
A true Englishman doesn't joke when he is talking about so serious a thing as a wager.
My friends always joke that I run on batteries.
A symphony is no joke.