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I could lie and say my wife cooks for me, but she doesn't. My wife has never learnt cooking but she has great cooks at home.
I hate desks; they make me feel like a child doing homework.
How could I make a little book, when I have seen enough to make a dozen large books?
There is no god, so how can I consider myself a god? God is the greatest lie invented by man.
You can't make everybody love what you do, but you can know how great you feel doing it.
At clubs like Liverpool, great players come and go.
He's a fool that marries, but he's a greater that does not marry a fool; what is wit in a wife good for, but to make a man a cuckold?
I don't drink. I don't like it. It makes me feel good.
People have got to learn: if they don't have cookies in the cookie jar, they can't eat cookies.
