Zitat des Tages von Johnny Vegas:
My work's never been accepted by my family, but it's something I'll always carry on with.
When I wasn't as attractive as I am now, I suffered at the hands of cruel children and their taunts until I realised that confidence and a bit of aesthetic care can overcome that.
It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether.
I'd never experienced stress before I did stand-up, and it was a massive shock to my system, this thing of waking up, and the nerves of, 'You're on stage tonight.'
For the greater good, I thought I should be a spiritual leader for people for some reason.
I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This is a really telling sign that I need to go back on the comedy circuit again.
I thought I could play the hellraiser and then put 'Johnny Vegas' back in his box. I found popularity through self-destruction. The more you damage yourself, the more people are drawn to you, and that can be quite addictive. It is not a lifestyle you can maintain.
I've spent lots of time in London, I studied in London, I like London. It's just not my home.
With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle.
You don't want to be flattered and become big-headed by getting awards. But, well, I am.
Writing a book about yourself is like therapy, and you go 'Oh My God, that's the reason that happened.' Writing about it, you're forced to really examine things.
Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.
The idea of being on TV 24 hours a day and people seeing the real me... No.
There's lots of stuff about me being a fan of Cliff but not being gay. Which suggests that he is, but he's not. Anyway, this is Channel 4, let their lawyers sort it out.
You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led.
I believe that Britain is becoming more class-conscious, and I quake at the very idea of Old Etonians ruling the world again.
Being 'Johnny' was almost like an out of body experience. I thought he was just a character that I'd created and could quite easily step away from, but it was much more difficult than that.
I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind.
Never try to be witty with U.S. airport officials. It's always lost on them and you'll find yourself being put back on the plane.
You get people who come to London, sever links with where they come from, and then when they need people, there's nobody there. To feel like you can't go back home would be a horribly sad place to be, as is mistaking fame for genuine love and affection.
I still give myself the right to be highly critical of others, though.
We had a week off in the middle of shooting, but as soon as everyone stopped, we all went down with six different types of flu and other unmentionable diseases.
I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts come up.
Had I become a priest, the sermons would've been electric!
My first holiday to San Francisco in 1998-99 was supposed to be a two-week vacation but I ended up staying five weeks and nearly didn't come home.
I think if you're at the point where you're popular enough to sell your wedding photos to OK! Magazine then you don't need the money.
My forte is playing drunks down the ages. When my agent rings me about a role, I don't ask what the part is, but what century it's in.
Up North you are holding your own. Everyone considers themselves a comedian.
I've been offered all the reality TV shows but have turned them down. If I did it as 'Johnny,' there'd be no jungle left! It was really hard regaining control of myself, so I am reluctant to let 'Johnny' back out of the box.
I actually enjoy being heckled; it keeps it interesting, and I think it is a nice feeling for people once they have left the show.
If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I'd probably spend a lot of money on it.
Health-wise, I couldn't have said what my life expectancy would've been if I'd just carried on doing solid blocks of stand-up.
I came back from university thinking I knew all about politics and racism, not knowing my dad had been one of the youngest-serving Labour councillors in the town and had refused to work in South Africa years ago because of the situation there. And he's never mentioned it - you just find out. That's a real man to me. A sleeping lion.
I use very few muscles at the best of times.
There's this idea that it has to be made in London. But we've got everything up here, and if you've got comics who are gifted because of where they're from, you shouldn't drag them away from that natural resource.
I used to attract a lot of feeders. I'd be quite happy to be locked in someone's flat and fed liquidised burgers.
