Zitat des Tages von Douglas Adams:
If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.
He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.
I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
I don't think anybody would argue now that the Internet isn't becoming a major factor in our lives. However, it's very new to us. Newsreaders still feel it is worth a special and rather worrying mention if, for instance, a crime was planned by people 'over the Internet.'
When you write your first book aged 25 or so, you have 25 years of experience, albeit much of it juvenile experience. The second book comes after an extra year sitting in bookshops. Pretty soon, you begin to run on empty.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.
In order to fly, all one must do is simply miss the ground.
Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space.
My absolute favourite piece of information is the fact that young sloths are so inept that they frequently grab their own arms and legs instead of tree limbs, and fall out of trees.
Because the Internet is so new, we still don't really understand what it is. We mistake it for a type of publishing or broadcasting, because that's what we're used to. So people complain that there's a lot of rubbish online, or that it's dominated by Americans, or that you can't necessarily trust what you read on the Web.
We no longer think of chairs as technology; we just think of them as chairs. But there was a time when we hadn't worked out how many legs chairs should have, how tall they should be, and they would often 'crash' when we tried to use them.
The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.
Time is bunk.
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
The impossible often has a kind of integrity which the merely improbable lacks.
I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.
You live and learn. At any rate, you live.
Books are sharks... because sharks have been around for a very long time. There were sharks before there were dinosaurs, and the reason sharks are still in the ocean is that nothing is better at being a shark than a shark.
After ten years of word processing, I can't even do hand writing anymore.
The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees.
The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
I wanted to be a writer-performer like the Pythons. In fact, I wanted to be John Cleese, and it took me some time to realise that the job was, in fact, taken.
This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry 'I could have thought of that' is a very popular and misleading one, for the fact is that they didn't, and a very significant and revealing fact it is too.
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair.
I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?
Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?