Roseanne Barr Zitate auf Englisch

Zitat des Tages von Roseanne Barr:

I know that I pay 48 percent of my income to taxes. You know, I wouldn't mind so much if it wasn't going just to export war. If it was actually going to help the people of the United States, I would gladly pay more.

When I used to watch comedians with my dad, he laid it all out for me. He wanted to be a comedian himself, and he was so funny. We'd watch stand-up on TV, and he'd tell me the subtext of what they were saying.

Roseanne Barr

I want to say that nobody accuses their parents of abusing them without justification to do that. I didn't just make it up. A lot of things were true and abusive and horrible things that happened to me that my father did.

Roseanne Barr

Birth control that really works - every night before we go to bed we spend an hour with our kids.

Roseanne Barr

I do say that I am in favor of the return of the guillotine and that is for the worst of the worst of the guilty.

Roseanne Barr

I think I should be here alone to rethink the world - I do. I want these lesser humans gone.

Roseanne Barr

I consider myself to be a pretty good judge of people... that's why I don't like any of them.

Roseanne Barr

I'm God because I have the power to control my mind.

Roseanne Barr

Imitation is the sincerest form of show business.

Roseanne Barr

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.

Roseanne Barr

A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then there's my personal favorite, the male ego.

Roseanne Barr

Ever since I was a girl, I have written about one to five pages every day - on napkins, on scrap paper, in notebooks and tablets, on the walls in my room as a teenager, and in orange paint on the cheap white plastic blinds in my room.

Roseanne Barr

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and I feel they should all worship me. That's what I told my kids.

Roseanne Barr

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job.

Roseanne Barr

My real life is funnier than anything on TV.

Roseanne Barr

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war. Just a greater emphasis on military apparel.

Roseanne Barr

I like to get people talking. I am a provocateur, and I do like getting on Twitter and riling people up. You know what, after a while some sane dialogue and sane conclusions come of that kind of thing.

Roseanne Barr

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

Roseanne Barr

I know how to do anything, I'm a mom.

Roseanne Barr

I'm a farmer now, and it's fantastic. My goal is to be totally self-sufficient and grow everything that I eat. There's something about earning your dinner that's cool.

Roseanne Barr

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

Roseanne Barr

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

Roseanne Barr

I know that I pay 48 percent of my income to taxes. You know, I wouldn't mind so much if it wasn't going just to export war. If it was actually going to help the people of the United States, I would gladly pay more.

Roseanne Barr

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.

Roseanne Barr

I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny. And I discovered a lot of great writers that went on to do a lot of great shows like 'Seinfeld,' 'Friends,' you know, 'Three and a Half Men.'

Roseanne Barr

There is no real third party in America. There's this one party that has two sides to it - the Democratic and Republican side. It's one party that has two heads.

Roseanne Barr

I do kabbalistic meditation. It's not unlike time travel; it can change the past and not just the future. You can look at what was lost and go beyond the grief of what was lost.

Roseanne Barr

It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.

Roseanne Barr

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a hell of a lot more to being a mother than most people suspect.

Roseanne Barr

Growing up in a Jewish matriarchal world inside the patriarchal paradise of Salt Lake City, Utah, gave me increased perspective on gender issues, as it also did my gay brother and my lesbian sister. Our younger sister is the perfect Jewish-American wife and mother, and is fiercely proud of that fact.

Roseanne Barr

I'm kosher except for times where I eat pork and shellfish.

Roseanne Barr

I had - after I sang the 'Star Spangled Banner' so badly, after my tragic singing accident, after that, you know, all my stuff kind of, like, really got even more full blown and, you know, I got stage fright and, you know, I couldn't do stand-up anymore and let alone sing and all the other things.

Roseanne Barr

Excuse the mess but we live here.

Roseanne Barr

I actually regard Facebook as a huge bore, but I cannot refrain from participating in it. I guess I crave the feeling of hope it gives me to think that today will be different from yesterday, that I will find an interesting comment or poke or video, and on the extremely rare occasion when that happens, I am just thrilled.

Roseanne Barr

The fact that my grown kids like to hang out with me, I mean, it just - I don't think it really can get any better than that, I don't think.

Roseanne Barr

Patriarchy is a bully notion, which if you will notice never attacks a nation that can defend itself. Zionism is patriarchal and sets Judaism on its head.

Roseanne Barr

You kind of restructure your whole personality to be in a healthy relationship.

Roseanne Barr