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There are lots of people in my life I just don't get the chance to see as much as I would like.
The minute you make people laugh, you get them to listen.
And when people give me their word, I listen to them.
I don't come from Lake Wobegon, and that world is not mine. It's not that funny to me. It's funny to other people, and I'm not judging it, but the world that I come from is not considered funny by other people as well. There's so much pain in it.
Most of our fans are the hardworking people of the world. They are the people who have made this country great.
I found out that if you made people laugh, they like you. Most people got to like me because I made them laugh. When they didn't, I hit them.
If we had more time for discussion we should probably have made a great many more mistakes.
I don't get paid like a person that everyone knows, but I get paid so much more in so many ways.
In death, you get upgraded into a saint no matter how much people hated you in life.